gahughhh!

I don't know if I've noted this yet... but I seriously like, require a roommate to go to sleep at a sane hour. It's five in the morning. Well, twenty too, but that's beside the point- - it'll be five by the time I actually get into bed... Grr, argh. (which I realize now is the right way to spell it, but screw it, I'm gonna keep texting Grr, arg to everyone :P) 

Hope everyone's having fun in New York and I hope they all get back safely! Love those guys... :D

Okay, well, my essay's done, my tutorial question's done, I've started writing two songs for the super awesome action musical of mine (permission to laugh granted, goodness knows I'd be doing it if I weren't dead on my feet) (...) (mmm, undead, Spike...)

Yeah, I slept in a bathtub on Saturday. That was a whole bunch of fun. Actually, I'm not even being sarcastic, everything that night was fun, except the little part before the bathtub. No, it wasn't me barfing. 

GAHUGHHHH!!!!

art

"It's like... Part of me sees it as this thing that's so simple, and honest and organic, that's just about the expression of feelings. And then i see how hard everyone is trying to describe it and i just feel like it's been made into something that's complicated and hard to define, not cause it's hard to define, but because people need it to be hard to define. Like instead of saying 'everything' they try to figure out everything that is and justify that when it just is." 

I read a super rad article that solidified my opinion- because you know what? Everything is ultimately about feelings; stories are simply, and have been, a convenient and conventional way of portraying this. The article (Life in the Shit Factory, Darren O'Donnell) says:

"... stories are simply one tool among many. What theatre is really about - like any other form - is generating affect, and that's it. Feelings. And, if things go well, quickly following feelings will be thought." 

catching up...

so i really shouldn't be doing this cause i have two essays, three lectures to catch up on, a tutorial question and, y'know, those pesky film blogs... and, you know, school ends in a month cause my school's stupid like that... grr, arg. which i say a lot now, apparently.

first of all, castle rules. so so so sweet. i mean, come'on! a guy who's singing his own theme song in a car pretending he's fighting bad guys and then have the bad guy FALL on the car, and then have him ACTUALLY fight the bad guys while the theme song starts going on in the background?! AWESOME!!! carly now thinks i'm insane cause i was squealing the entire time and giggling when "nothing funny was happening". but it was so so so good. 

buffy comics= awesome. that's it, they're just amazing. won't write my favs yet cause a certain someone has to finish it, which also scratches my buffy series wrap up, but it's all good! 

spring awakening was killer. so so so good, although there was this guy sitting in front of me who was really tall, and there was a guy sitting in front of him who was really tall... it was like freaking dominoes, chinese guy would move, angry tall caucasian would move and i'd have to shift further into the personal seat space of the guy beside me- but amy and julie had good seats, so it's all good. 

but it was awesome. seriously, seeing all the songs in context, watching those actors and actresses, getting drawn into the story, the frustrations, the successes and (unfortunately) many downfalls was... refreshing, enlightening, whatever. "Left Behind" is possibly the saddest song- julie cried, said that she couldn't stand it when parents cried for their kids----

Sidebar; i don't cry in shows. when i went to go see rent i didn't cry (seeing their faces may have helped, but oh well), when i saw rent in the theatre, amy was balling (she cried during spring too) and i was like, humph, that's sad. 

what else to catch up on that i won't be writing separate blogs on... dad's birthday today- happy birthday!

--- LOOK AT ME, I'M DANCING CRAZY! ----

and now, something i wrote in my essay (which i realized i had to do at three in the morning the day it was due...), but i think this is the only thing really believe (even though all of it i guess i believe, but i still don't agree that it should be so complicated, art is about being organic and true to yourself and what you're trying to say no matter how you're trying to say it. the very essence of art is simple, it's... maybe they're just doing that thing where they overcomplicate something because it's so simple that they don't understand it. they have to make it complicated so that they don't have to admit to not understanding... anyhow,:

"It is through our creativity that we make links and that we are able to modify, expand and reevaluate our own conceptual map so that for those few hours we can all share an experience and through discourse participate in what was and is currently being created for us. Through a common discourse and the institution of the theatre, a community comes together to create an experience that draws on what we know and what we need, what we aspire to do and what we are inspired to do."  

when spike looks to buffy in the barn and says "help me." my heart breaks a little. he's so utterly pathetic, confused, helpless, hopeless, [insert synonym] that... it's so sad. and then buffy goes and tells him that she believes he's a changed man and he can be a good man, and then he gets kidnapped and he refuses to give up hope that she's coming for her, and then she DOES and he just looks at her like he can't believe it, like even though he'd been saying it the entire time, it was still something he didn't really think was happening... like he believed she'd come, yeah, but also wouldn't be mad if she didn't... and then she did... so so so amazing. 

i have a lot of batteries.

(obsessive) 

 

also, when spike says, "no i'll save her, THEN i'll kill her!", he has absolutely, no, freakin', clue as to where in the hell he's going. his dedication is touching. 

banff!!! (2?)

(1) we started off at the hot springs- if you're going to go, go in the morning cause once noon rolls around lots of people start showing up- if you go in the morning, everyone's coming while you're going :) so we left and ate food in the car (strawberries, grapes, a slice of pickle, a small pita pocket, a couple things of lettuce (this is the third time i'm writing this because the first time i used the arrow key.... UGH!!!) because we're not supposed to eat meat today. we went to starbucks for coffee/snacks on the way back mom saw a bear. "look at the bear! it's big! sandra, go, i'll take a picture of you!" "okay! BEAR FIVE! (2)" (small kid with father) "look'it!" (father, deadpan) "yes. it's a bear." while me and mom pose for another picture. went to car but decided to walk through "central park". yeah, not that one, the one in banff. huge rock with kids climbing/all around it. tore away from dad's restraining arms and climbed up it (3). i'm cookie. ate bear paw (4)- tastes like hershey bar but... worse. but now i'm officially canadian. river running though banff ends in falls- sign saying "danger falls ahead" which is punny (cause the pointy stick person is 'falling' of the 'falls'. warning sign (5) makes me very very, oh so happy. 

(1)  (2)  (3) 

                                                       

(4)  (5)

we kept walking in central park and i started playing with the camera, taking a bunch of pictures of myself and (6) was one i liked :P my parents were started to get annoyed with me though, cause i was kinda really hyper. there was also a black lab that had a stick in his mouth as  long as he was and it kept hitting the rocks and stuff- the dog looked so happy with himself :P we started heading back and dad wanted to go see the falls so we went to go see the falls and sat on a bench. i took pictures and annoyed everyone until mom took the camera away from me but i did manage to get (7) before that happened. and i saw a really cool cloud that looked kinda like a goblin (8)... i think i've watched too much buffy :P this old(er) guy started a snowball fight with his family and i think he played baseball or something cause he was awesome. then there english people showed up and were right in front of us and were talking, which was awesome cause they're accents were so cool. then the one kid slipped and fell into the ice and got his "trousers" entirely wet and he got a good cheer from the crowd to- it was hilarious. 

(6)  (7) 

(8)  (9)

       

dad decided he wanted to go up the gondalia so up we went while mom (who said it wasn't her thing) stayed at the bottom. we were really high up (9) and some nice dude asked if we wanted him to take a picture of the two of us, which was really nice of him (10). then i started taking pictures of myself again (11). i think i took 100 pictures up there? mom asked me to document it well :P on the way down i made a video (it took 7:17 minutes to go top to bottom... we had to share a car with this asian dad and his kid... the kid was giggling for a little while and i was laughing cause it was so weird and random). we went to lake... miswesagee? something like that. it was really really windy (12) but really nice and mountain-y. i started fooling around with the camera again (13). then i realized my sunglasses were really reflect-y so i started trying to get a good shot of them (14). i took a lot of these... mom was not impressed :P but she did agree to take one final picture of me on the rocks!! (15) then we came home, watched the game (flames... wow, really?)/showered/tea'd it up/they turned in early cause they're lame. granted, we did wake up at 7 (ugh, i went to sleep like... 2?) but it was all in all a fun yet tiring day. 

ended up with 209 pictures or something like that. i shouldn't be allowed near a camera...

(10)  (11)  (12)

   

(13)  (14)

       

(15)

 - - - - - 

i miss shoveling. <3 

being home rocks.

So An Era Ends..

Or not really... I finished watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer series today. At least 25 episodes in the past three days. It's been a good time. Probably post up a blog about the most memorable things that happened, but only after a certain someone finishes watching so it's spoiler free ;) 

I don't know what I'm going to do... probably work, and that's a good thing. And I guess I can always go back and re-watch the series... That could be a possibility. I think Spike and Anya were my favorite characters, Spike because, well, he's awesome and all tormented and messed up and Anya cause... who can't love someone who's afraid of bunnies? Jeepers, that character was amazing. Gonna miss 'em all. 

It was raining... and then it started snowing... and now it's snowing in April. 

And I'm about this > |   | close to saying 'Screw you York! I don't speak latin very well but that's not the point!' Or at least the first part and not the last, although the last is true... but not really relevant. So York expects me to wait until mid-June to find out whether or not I'm going to be going to school in Toronto? I get that they can't accept me without knowing my marks but it's completely ridiculous to leave me in the dark about my chances! I need to take care of housing! I need to figure out if my stuff's going to need to be stored for the summer. I want to know what I'm doing next year!! 

First the strike and now this bullshit. I'm seriously not impressed. Apparently this school doesn't give a shit about it's students or care about inconveniencing them. I'm not sure if I want to graduate and have this school attached to my name. 

Feeling: 

(pissedalltohell)

Ps. I think my roommate harbors a not-so-secret grudge that I seemingly have no work to do while she's slaving away at the books. 

with permission from diggy:

tamara is annoyingly pesky. 

hehehehee. tehehehe.